Monday, November 23, 2009

Kar ban

In the interest of preserving some sanity among cinema viewers and giving the triflest of respect to logic, movies of Kurbaan's kind should not be allowed to be made and if the makers still persist, should be banned at the first opportunity.

The movie is nothing different from what was on offer in 'New York' and the Saif-Kareena pair seems rotten to say the least. The movie starts off the same stale way that has happened in millions of movies if not more. The hero and heroine wait for a taxi at the same time. One gets it conning the other and behold , of all the miracles they meet at the same spot, a college where Madam Kareena is a professor and SAK is vying for a professor's job and the badgering continues. SAK tries wooing lady love in a cut short way while explaining there's no point in taking the longer route and not surprisingly she falls for him and they happily move to Amrica. Lovely wife suddenly realises that her dear hubby infact is a terrorist in the guise of a professor who 'used' her to reach the country he holds responsible for his grief and plans to blow up. A 'secret' that is hidden only from her, not the audience. This is when trouble begins..Not in their paradise but the movie hall...Enter Kirron Kher, Dia Mirza and Om Puri and a host of others who failed to find work elsewhere and the rest neither be told nor cared to be heard.

Vivek Oberoi as the pro-American, anti-fundamentalist TV reporter is wasted playing second fiddle to SAK. And it was refreshing to see Khulbhushan even though sadly it was just for a passing second. What has the world come?? Shakaal being treated like some filthy junior artist.

The clincher is a scene where VO scours through a lady's purse despite knowing that there's a bomb in it and gleefully hands it to the police with a glint in his eyes seeking a pat, a la Tushar Dalvi, "Sir he ghya bomb, mala jau dya sir please..."

The movie is best prescribed to one who thinks he's seen it all in life. Try sitting through Om Puri saying "aaj chai pine ka mann nai hai, coffee pilao" and bearing Kirron Kher in her atrocious hindi made to sound like an Afghan's which might drive Osama Bin Laden to suicide if he happens to hear her out "Bhai sahab aapko diabetes hoti, chai naai peeti,shakkar naai khati...". Fancy her calling her husband Bhaisahab.

In order to make it a little intersting they should have at least included an item numberby Rakhi Sawant or Sherlyn Chopra.

P.S For those who don't know who Tushar Dalvi is, he is Nostradamus reincarnate :)

9 comments:

  1. I agree with the writer of this blog. But, come on, let's be honest, what did you expect in a movie containing the above mentioned names....they'll be doing the same s*** in their next births too!!!
    Karan Johar's gone nuts, no SRK in the movie, not even for the item number with you know who!!!
    (even Kaal had one :) )

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  2. seriously why the hell did u even go and see the movie... :( were u sooooo bored that u went to see crap like that!!! and what did Tushar do to u.. ' a la Tushar Dalvi, "Sir he ghya bomb, mala jau dya sir please..." ' hahahaha... funny man!!! :D

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  3. thanks chiku :)
    actually its worth a watch...
    u get to know that movies can be made in this way too..
    n about Tushar...he is a genius without any limits..
    Nostradamus Jr. has the potential to do something not just to me but enlighten the whole world..
    such is his class.. :)

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  4. whoa! this review spoils my plan to go watch the movie...:P

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  5. Awwww...come on..it was not thaaaaaaaaaat bad...
    I thought the acting at certain places was intense Shashank...and that song between the lead pair quite made up for any god-damn item number by the two bimbettes u mentioned..:)
    It was predictable but slightly more pacey than New York...well, that's my opinion...:)

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  6. @ Madhu..
    Thanks for reading the post
    and I probably saved u the pain, time and money..
    and no its ok no need for a treat :)

    @Suruchi
    Your opinion is invaluable... :)
    Yes a part of the movie was good but had to wait for aeons for the interval...
    an item number with 'barely' clad Sherlyn Chopra can make one forgive the movie team's atrocities.. wotssay??
    n thanks for visiting my blog
    Cheers :)

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  7. Thank you dear Shashank. It seems you have become a rescue ranger of sorts - rescuiing people from the agony and exasperation of bad cinema viewing :) well done, keep up the good work. PS - i too feel very strongly against movies which linger in 'between' ; neither close to good nor to bad. these r the worst kinds meant for fools to watch. Gross wastage of man hours :) cheers..

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  8. hey shashank..
    i completely agree with you on this, and i guess, the audience too agrees..Kurbaans pathetic box office collections are a testimony to this fact...even Saifeena and Karan Johars brand name could not save this film..
    I guess New York was much better and well directed..Kurbaan lost the plot completely.!

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  9. Hey thanks Prtwish :)
    a real sad movie

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